I cried aloud to the Lord,

and he answered me from his holy hill.

Psalm3:4

Here is an unusual prayer: I pray that today will have been the worst day of my life. No, nothing catastrophic happened, but rather I have come to the point where the same old thing must not continue. I may seem rather religious to others, but to those who know me, I may seem like a complete fraud. Why the disconnect? Do I know God? If I do, the fruit of my life should be love, joy, peace, patience . . .  Not a callous inconsideration for the needs of others! Can anyone else relate to this?

I know enough about life to identify cycles. Coming off a mountaintop experience, a valley beckons every time. So what seems so nascent today is not necessarilly the whole truth. However, I've ID'd the pattern. It's not good. Heaven help me.