Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.
Henry David Thoreau
I have come to a crossroads. God has used some very painful circumstances in my life to highlight a need for change. He asks me three questions:
1. Who am I?
2. What do I want?
3. What will I do to get it?
God surely hates passivity. We dream, and hope for a bright future, when we are young. We might even be full of zeal for very worthy causes. But without focus, without asking those three questions, we shall never accomplish anything of importance. I don't know why, but somehow I always believed I will enter my destiny, accomplish my mission, "some day". With no planning. With no active execution. God would just "do it" someday. This is surely phony religious baloney. Like the man with the one talent who hid it, I will wake up one day with even what I have taken from men, unless I repent.
Living in the moment while having a plan for the future, and an understanding of the past, could be the key to everything. Living life to its fullest means not waiting "until . . ." to be happy, or looking back to the "good old days", but, each day, waking up full of gratitude that He has given me another day to enjoy Him and His Creation.
I am asking the LORD for a new focus, and new understanding. His gifts and callings are "without repentance"; God does not change His mind. As Larry Crabb says, we do well to ask how we fit into God's plan, not how He fits into ours, if indeed we even HAVE a plan (I wonder if most men really don't). May I have the courage to make the changes I need to make. The time is short. Night comes soon, "When no man can work".